Try, try again. And again. And again and again and again.
That's kind of how I've felt when it comes to Kaelyn's eating. It took her some time to figure out how to chow down on her bottle, but once she got it, she was unstoppable. Anything to get that dang feeding tube out of her nose, right? So for about 6 months we have been meeting with a feeding therapist to help her start eating food, food. i.e. baby food. And for six month's I haven't felt like we've gotten very far. Each time when went to feeding therapy, about every six weeks, I left a little more encouraged to recommit myself and nip this thing in the bud...but after a couple of days I was back to being discouraged. You see its a very delicate thing, we want eating to be a positive experience for her, so we don't want to push her to the point of tears (where she will go). Our feeding therapist is great, has wonderful tips and ideas, but most of all is encouraging and realistic with me. She helps me not feel like such a loser of a mom. She continues to remind me that Kaelyn is actually a good eater, after all she's been through and what she has to deal with. That she likes food, it will just take a little longer to figure the whole process out. Something that is easy to forget when I see a typical baby down a jar of baby food in a matter of minutes, when I would spend 20 minutes just to get a tablespoon of food into her mouth, and for that same tablespoon of food to come right back out.
So recently I've committed to do better at taking time each day to feed her "solids". At first it seemed to get worse. She would throw her head back and forth so I couldn't get near her mouth, and then when I did get near her lips, I would have use the crowbar spoon to pry those little things open. However this time around I didn't give up and take a few days off. I kept going, even if it was just a few bites of yogurt.
Yesterday I was giving her some peach/mango applesauce and guess what? She actually seemed to be liking it. She stopped flailing her head back and forth and let me hold her hands so I could get it in her mouth. Then she would chomp on it a little, and the best part...it stayed in her mouth and went down her throat. In the past I've had serious doubts that she was ever swallowing the baby food. So then tonight we tried pears mixed with oatmeal, and again she ate it. She downed half a jar, which is monumental for her! It about brought me to tears numerous times. It's amazing how something so simple as eating baby food, that many parents take for granted...at least I would if I didn't have Kaelyn, can bring so much happiness to a mom. Kaelyn teaches me how to enjoy the small things in life and small things happen daily, so that makes for one happy mama. Next step I'll be waiting for is when she will open her mouth voluntarily, so I can just shovel that good-ness in.
If there are any mom's out there that has had similiar experiences with their kids, please share any good ideas/tips you may have.
"Gimmie the spoon mom, I'll do it MYSELF!"
She was not about to smile for me
11 comments:
Fortunately, we have not had that problem, but I have read so many blogs that do.
Two blogs that come to mind - maybe you could check them out or leave a comment:
http://loveforcolin.blogspot.com/
http://wwwourunexpectedjourney.blogspot.com/
Good luck :)
Oh my goodness! Ah, this eating stuff is so hard! We are pretty much in the same with Conner. We have only made progress since getting his gtube in October. And only in the past 2 weeks did he decide to actually start 'eating' what we are trying to give him. (Who is your feeding therapist?).
He really likes his special cup that the therapist gave me (a flexible plastic cup with an area cut out so it won't hit his nose area when we tip the contents up towards his mouth, if that makes any sense!). We give him thicker liquids to drink, like baby food mixed with applesauce, and he will down it! He loves graham crackers which are nice because he only has 2 little teeth, but it's enough to munch on the cracker.
We try and give him food play experience a couple times a day. So whether it's playing in a tupperware of rice, or yogart plopped right on to the tray itself, or just our daily dinner, he gets to enjoy just touching it the way he wants to and experiencing food in a fun, positive way. This exercise has really gotten him more open to the idea of food being a good thing I think.
It is ridiculously hard to be all smiley and happy every single darn time you try and feed them and they do things like flip their head and/or look straight up at the ceiling like it's so much more interesting than what you are trying to do! Sometimes when I get so frustrated, I grit my teeth, while still smiling for Conner, and in the happiest voice I can muster, (happy thoughts happy thoughts) and I say "ooohhh, you little stinker butt you, sometimes I wanna ring that neck of yours, you eat this food right now!" etc etc. Then I get to say how frustrated I'm feeling, yet he has no idea, and thinks I'm cheering him on! Hahaha.
Also, I always try and eat whatever I'm asking Conner to eat. Or I will play in whatever food I'm asking Conner to play in. I get right in there and show him what I want him to be doing. Sounds are also a big part of our routine. He watches me eat my cereal every morning, and I "Hmmmm! yummmmmy!" it up the whole time I'm eating the food, and then when it's his turn to eat, I use the same sounds, so he hopefully recognizes the positive in both things.
Man, it seems like everyday I'm left feeling like I could be doing better, but I think it's just natural to get down on yourself easily. These are things you probably already know/do, but maybe there is something new I mentioned.
Best of luck to both of you in this crazy journey of food eating!!!!!
Lets get them together and let them have a food fight! :)
Thanks a lot!!!!
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I to think she is a rockstar for eating as well as she does, with her rocky first few months. I cant believe she has no feeding tube! Way to go with a half a jar! Thats a huge step. I wish I had ideas. You'd think I would with two DS kids. But one is strictly tube fed and the other one eats like a champ! I think on the eating front the orphanage actually helped a bit. She had to eat what they gave her by spoon or she starved. So the girl will eat anything.
Cant wait to play next Friday, I'll post it on my facebook. And are you a part of the new yahoo group for Utah DS moms? I'll post it on there too.
Oh boy can I relate to that thrashing of the head back and forth.We are just where you are after our pit stops with all Miss Z's issues.My goal this year is much the same as yours.
The website talktools.net has some fabulous things that will really help you along the way.Things to facilitate getting over the oral aversion part.with a whole bunch of tools and links to get you and Kaelyn to enjoying the feeding process.
I wish I had more idea for you and a magic wand because I so would be using it over here!Stubborn little things,aren't they?
Awesome! What an amazing little girl! She is learning and it's sooooo cool! You ARE a GREAT Mom! Love ya tons!
I totally feel for you Jeana! My 5 year old has some major issues with food. After many many test and doctors visits, we've ruled out any physical reason, and have learned he has texture issues. It is the biggest struggle, and has been since he was born, to get the kid to eat, and mostly ENJOY food. It can be SO frustrating! What I've learned is, like you said, make sure food is a fun thing, and never force feed. Sometimes it takes over and hour to finish half a sandwhich (and he's 5), but it's getting better and better! It's hard because as a mom, you want to make sure they are getting all their nutrients! But I've learned to relax about it, because the child can pick up on your anxiety about it and associate food with bad feelings. Also, this may sound dorky, but letting her watch you eat with a smile and some encouraging sounds after you take a bite (as if it's amazingly delicious) can help her see that it's an enjoyable process!
Oh my goodness you have such an amazing little family!!! We have the opposite problem MaCee wants to eat non stop all day long! Good Luck dear!!!
Oh I totally hear you. You've probably read all my complaing about Beau and feeds. We are actually trying to get into another feeding/swallowing clinic in Portland for another evaluation for some more help. One day our little ones will get it!!
So sorry for the feeding troubles! I can't relate, but the two things that popped into my mind were to give her something to fiddle/play with while you're trying to feed her, maybe another spoon or small toy. Also, how about those mesh feeders with a handle? Could you put food in there just to let her gum around with it? I don't know if she would even put it in her mouth, but maybe something she could do "herself" would help?
I know you will get through this!
We are in the same process right now. Josie got her g tube in September and we're trying to transition her back to oral feeds. The baby food is ok but drinking is her challenge. I purchased a Cip Kup from Ark Therapeutics http://www.arktherapeutic.com/Cip-kupSAR.html and she's really working on that. I celebrate if I can get her to take 2 ounces. From what I've been told, patience is the name of the game and sometimes that is a challenge for me. Feel free to email me at dualdownsdivas@gmail.com if you'd like to discuss it further. Good luck!
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